For aslong as I can remember, I’ve been labelled as ‘miserable’ ‘grumpy’ and the favourite Yorkshire slang ‘morngy’
I don’t know why, I’ve just always been the same with it. I don’t have a happy face and I can be fairly reserved. Never really ecstatic around my family, so they assumed I was a strange kid or super shy and quiet. Fact is, I’m not.
I have depression and (on the hype of Moanna, of which ‘you’re welcome’ has been trapped inside my skull for days) It doesn’t define me.
It took two years into university for my flat mates to force me to the doctors because my mood swings were far too erratic and they were quite sick of me. The doctors here in Scarborough are so nice in my experience. I walked into my Doctors office and immediately started crying. Like, crazy person-snot-wielding sobbing. About? Absolutely nothing. The poor guy hasn’t even said anything to me! I’d only just sat down! I do not like small spaces with other people inside with me, I get so tense and mad which makes me cry: pathetic right.
Anyway, I’ve been this way my entire life.
If you feel like crap when you wake up, you want to cry all the time, you feel yourself dipping emotionally for what you see as for no reason, then just go to the doctor. Tell them. Or tell someone. You know when people are always like ‘it felt like a weight was lifted?’
It’s true. I’ve been taking anti-depressants on and off for 3 years and I’m in a far better position than I was before. Because I’m no longer alone in dealing with this.